Here’s some little note: Today’s challenge is daunting…
I once read a quote that says something along the lines that people are like moons – we only want to show our bright side but not the dark one. There is some truth to that statement. It’s human nature. We avoid putting our hearts on our sleeves and publicize our weaknesses for all the whole (online) world to see… and you know… judge.
On second thought, I realized that I could use this challenge for some measure of much-needed introspection. Besides, while prudence calls that we should be careful with what we share, I cannot bear the thought that my liberty in writing is stunted by fear of judgment.
So today, I will share with you the good, the bad and the ugly of myself.
For this part, I asked my husband to fill in; his total impartiality and independent opinion would lend some credibility.
According to audit of my husband, here are his findings. He says that I’m…
…beautiful. – I really love this guy! Honesty Award!!!
…finance-savvy. I got into trouble into credit cards many years back that made me really serious about money. There’s an aptBisaya word for it – “nitagam“.
…diligent in doing quiet time. I love spending time with God, to be intimate with Him. I’m glad he noticed this. But disclosure, I’m still working out to really do it daily. The Lord deserves only the best.
…respectful. But this was not the case during the first two months in our marriage. My tongue was unbridled and I mindlessly spew hurtful words towards him.
Here we are… the embarrassing revelations. HAHAHA
Okay, for starters, have you heard of mañana habit? I have effortlessly mastered this one without the need of 21 days practice. Roy brands me as the “five-minutes” wife.
When he says wake up now. I say 5 minutes.
When he says go take a bath, you stink. I say 5 minutes.
When he asks babe, cook some breakfast. I say 5 minutes.
You get the drift. He loathes me for that. I guess he has learned to put a 5-minute allowance now to his requests.
This bad attitude leads to a lot of other problems such as tardiness. Husband also sees this as a symptom of my stubbornness.
Also, confrontation is not exactly my cup of tea. Most of the time my emotions get the better of me and I have difficulty expressing myself in the heat of the moment.
[Me: *praying my current and future employers will not find their way to this blog*]
Pride. This, I believe is my “most favorite sin”. I find it disgusting in other people but it would be fooling myself to say that I don’t have this monster as well.
I find it very difficult to be humble. I’m not humble. I wish I am. I try to be. So help me God.
I also struggle with forgiveness. The Bible says that blessed is the person who overlooks the offense of another. That’s not me. And I’m really asking God for help.
So there you go…the good, the bad and the ugly!
Friends, na-turn off kayo? Hahaha.
Actually, when I focus at myself and my ugliness (sin is super ugly guys), I become easily depressed. But when I turn to God’s Word, hope overwhelms me.
Consider these verses:
Rom 3:10 “As it is written, there is none righteous, no, not one” (Okay…so I’m not alone.)
Rom 8:1 “There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.” (Because I belong to Christ, I’m not condemned…Yes! Thank you Lord.)
Gal 2:20 “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” (Christ is living inside me and I’m a work-in-progress towards Christlikeness.)
There are so many Scripture passages to cite about my depravity as a sinner and yet so much hope in being a saved sinner. Why don’t you discover it for yourself? 😉